A Spiritual Connection

This is the tea set gifted to me.

Most people who know me know that I’m not a religious person. I tried to be agnostic for quite a long time, but the fact remains, I don’t believe in god as presented by any major religion. I was raised Catholic and went to church every Sunday. I went to Catholic school from kindergarten through 8th grade. I’ve read the bible and the religious texts of several other religions. The fact remains, god is not for me.

I want to be very clear, I am NOT anti-religion. I truly believe that a great deal of good can flow through this world because of religion. However, my problems with religion lie with the potential motivations for that good. The biggest issue I’ve ever had with religion is the reward system. You do good so you can get into heaven. That dogma has made me question the motivations for everyone who has ever reached out to me on a religious level. I try to do good things because it helps other people feel good which, in turn, helps me feel good.

The second big issue I have with religion is the blatant arrogance by some devout believers. Several years ago I was doing live sound for a religious event. There was music, singing, dancing, and just general worship. Towards the end of the event, the main performer asked the audience, “How many of you know, without a doubt, that if the rapture happened right now, you’d be taken?” Everyone raised their hands. The organizer of the event was standing next to me at the mixing console. I had not raised my hand. She turned to me and said, “I noticed you didn’t raise your hand.” She did not like my response. I said to her, “How can I presume to know the will of god?” I don’t think anyone has ever looked at me with such sadness in their eyes.

I just finished reading “Astrophysics for People in a Hurry” by Neil degrasse Tyson. In one chapter he discussed the potential intelligence level for alien life. He likens it to the information processing differences between apes and humans. We can teach apes to do a lot of things, but they will never be able to do complex math. In the same way, aliens could be on that next level of cognitive processing. Tyson suggests that they may look upon the greatest minds of our time with amusement because they were slightly ahead of the rest of humanity. He also suggests that these alien children might bring home complex calculus equations from nursery school to be hung on the fridge by their parents.

This is exactly how I view god. Whether our lives were created or seeded or accidental, whatever was able to put us here must be on a totally different level of cosmic understanding and appreciation than myself. I can’t imagine to ever be able to understand the will and purpose of a being that powerful.

How does this relate to tea?

For much of my life, I’ve had a spiritual void. I’ve wanted to feel connected to something greater than myself, but have been left wanting. That is, until I traveled to Taiwan to study tea. The predominant “religion” in the area is Taoism. I use quotes because it is more of an ideology than a formal religion. There is nothing that suggests you can’t be a Taoist as well as a practicing Catholic (or whatever else).

What drew me to Taoism first was the general attitude of the people I met in Taiwan. There was an amazing disconnect from possessions as well as an overwhelming feeling of warmth and happiness. We learned very quickly not to compliment something in someone’s personal space. There were many times where we admired the beauty of something and the owner responded with, “Please take it. It’s yours.” In fact, my most prized tea set was given to me by a tea maker on our second trip to Taiwan. While we were working, I saw the set and remembered it from the previous year. There was a price listed and it was more than I would usually spend on something like that. In my head I was calculating how much money I would have left to buy tea if I purchased that set. In the end, I decided to buy the set because it was beautiful. I told the tea maker that I remembered the set from last year and I love it so much and I would like to buy it. After all that worrying and calculations, he just gave it to me. I was floored.

I learned after our first trip that this warmth and disconnection came from the basic tenets of Taoism. Thus began my investigations. The more I read about Taoism, the more it made sense to me. To define those tenets in the simplest terms-your possessions do not define you and work to make yourself better before you try to change someone else. I firmly believe that working to make yourself happy first, you won’t ever have to worry about trying to make someone else happy and your relationships will flourish.

I have also worked hard to remove my financial and sentimental attachments from my possessions. As someone who has worked professionally in fields that require tens of thousands of dollars of equipment, that has been difficult. My first step was to purge myself of things I no longer use and that no longer bring me joy.

So again, how does this relate to tea.

In Taiwan there is an inherent connection between tea and Taoism. My studies of the Chinese tea ceremony have taught me that tea is the conduit for a period of self-reflection and self-evaluation. Performing the ceremony is a time where there is nothing else in the world. My phone is put away, the kids are gone (because they currently have no interest in tea), and work is set aside. The ceremony helps bring my existence into a small enough bubble that I am able to reflect and set new goals in a constant attempt to make myself a better person.

Tea is my Zen.